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Behavioral Covenant
[Behavioral Covenants in Congregations: A Handbook for Honoring Differences by Gilbert R. Rendle published by Alban Institute (1998)]
As I have worked with communities in transition and conflict, I have always brought up this book and recommended creating a mutually agreeable covenant. No one has ever taken me up on the offer. Every community always said “It’s not that bad here.” Would we tolerate prolonged bad behavior that vexes our relationships if we recognized a shared covenant in dealing with one another?
For us and Prep the Day, because I want to honor all voices and welcome all perspectives into conversation, we will operate with an implied behavioral covenant. Here it is:
This is s safe space. I am of value and my perspective matters. Likewise, the person who otherwise seems in opposition to me and their perspective matters. We will seek to hear all opinions and understand one another.
We will stay away from the language of hate and anger. Instead, we will ask serious questions seeking to understand. We will speak for ourselves (I believe that… OR I feel like…). We will stay away from accusations. In all things we will try our best to recognize one another as valued members of the shared community we seek to create together.
As I have worked with communities in transition and conflict, I have always brought up this book and recommended creating a mutually agreeable covenant. No one has ever taken me up on the offer. Every community always said “It’s not that bad here.” Would we tolerate prolonged bad behavior that vexes our relationships if we recognized a shared covenant in dealing with one another?
For us and Prep the Day, because I want to honor all voices and welcome all perspectives into conversation, we will operate with an implied behavioral covenant. Here it is:
This is s safe space. I am of value and my perspective matters. Likewise, the person who otherwise seems in opposition to me and their perspective matters. We will seek to hear all opinions and understand one another.
We will stay away from the language of hate and anger. Instead, we will ask serious questions seeking to understand. We will speak for ourselves (I believe that… OR I feel like…). We will stay away from accusations. In all things we will try our best to recognize one another as valued members of the shared community we seek to create together.